Saturday morning finds us tucked inside the very nostalgic Hotel Colorado in the heart of Glenwood Springs. The trees are shifting into Fall and the changing of the seasons is at it's peak about now. The gorgeous mountain foliage unfolds lush ribbons of gold, orange, plum and green right before us. The Earth's beauty completely overwhelms me.
Finally, I am finding the time to become relaxed and a little more open-minded. That, and I am eagerly anticipating a much needed day at the nearby Yampah spa. It seems Alan has managed to surprise me yet again by doing something fantastic for us. Something that I'd not ordinarily expect. Turns out he's whisked us away via train (which I definitely have a thing for) to a weekend retreat for the sole purpose of getting some desperately needed R&R. Our mission for the day is simple: to find peace, comfort and solitude encapsulated somewhere within a blueberry and yogurt anti-oxidant body wrap. De-lish!
Lying there nude wrapped only in blueberries, yogurt and light covers with a towel of lavender oil wrapped around my neck was bizarrely liberating. It allowed me to dream from deep within for the first time in what feels like ages. Add to that the fact that I finally finished the supremely fascinating, mind-altering American Gods novel by Neil Gaiman. I already long to let my mind wander.
Amidst my cellophane and aluminum enclosures, I was in the process of unconsciously mixing deep, irrational thoughts with sublime relaxation whenst I descended into a coma-like haze. Suddenly, it became difficult to decipher between what is (or has been) real and what I appear to have hallucinated. The last coherent memory I had was watching Alejandra bathe Alan's naked body in blue cream and place him in a wrap across from me in a sage-painted room. After that, I can't be sure of what was true and what was exponentially fabricated before drifting off. I can't even be sure of how much time really did pass. Two hours or two dynasties? So it goes...
I mentally disconnected myself from everyone and everything, only then could I be alone with my thoughts. And then it happened. Time revealed itself all over again, right in front of me in the form of a flashback. I didn't realize it at first, but I was looking at myself from a life I had lived a very long time ago. I was beautiful and young at what was the prime of my life. I was sitting high on an amazingly steep mountain ledge not far from here... long raven hair flowing across my back. A child of the Indian Nation? Almost pixie-like, I smiled knowingly at myself (as if through a mirror to the future) as the glorious Sun shone down on my glowing, bronzed skin. Orange flecks of fire danced wildly in my brown eyes.
The next thing I knew an oblivion had passed, and I was overlooking the same mountain ledge, this time at the droves of people that I once ruled. After all, I was an Empress. A respected, driven ruler who showed her people kindness and love. I was clad in regal metal attire and wore thick black eyeliner. Beautiful, but not to be taken lightly. It occurred to me that being powerful, brave and beautiful served me well all those years ago. How incredibly fierce a creature!
All too soon, dust was kicked up into my eyes, causing me to blink. Time flashed forward and I realized that I was back in the sage room at the spa again. Questions began to flood my conscience. I asked myself, "What did you accomplish for yourself and others while you ruled an Empire? How far did that beauty and bravery ever get you? What does it all mean?" Damn. Could I have imagined it all? Has the lavender oil gone to my head?
Back in the tiny room at the spa, I found myself only remembering fragments of what I'd just seen, experienced and imagined. I continue to forget the details even as I write. Did these images become visible to me in this rare instance now that I've released all preconceived notions of how time and space should function? Was this mysterious glimpse into my past lives mad possible once I lowered my guard and allowed my mind to be enprisoned no longer?
I didn't have any such visions for the remainder of the weekend, including the full body massage that followed, or the time spent meditating in the vapor caves in the basement of the spa. Infact, I've never had such a magnificent story told to me by myself before, and I can never be sure about where in my mental archives that episode was really pulled from. Bad acid flashbacks from the 90's? No way to ever be sure. But I can still smell the lavender on my skin...
Sunday, September 30, 2007
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